


Give Us This Day

by AdaptationDecay



Series: AD's Badfic [2]
Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bakery, Cosette is AWESOME!, Cosette plays matchmaker, Cosette saves the day, Deliberate Badfic, Epic bread theft, Eponine is such a fucking bitch, F/M, It's canon so suck it haters!, M/M, Nun puffs, Seriously though Cosette/Marius 5eva, but it all works out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-29
Updated: 2014-08-29
Packaged: 2018-02-15 06:20:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2219001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdaptationDecay/pseuds/AdaptationDecay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>BAkery AU where Javert owns a bakery and Valjean steals a loaf from him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Give Us This Day

Javert was getting a headache. 

The Montreal Summer Bakery And Cafe into which he had poured all his savings was barely breaking even, the teenage ditz he had hired to serve behind the counter spent all her time yakking and now his religieuse had come out of the oven all misshapen and were refusing to stand upright. It was a disaster

"It's a disaster!" he exclaimed.

"What's a disaster?"

He hadn't seen Cosette come in. She was wearing a Montreal Summer apron over a hoodie, short shorts and Ugg boots. Her long blonde hair was pulled into a high ponytail and long strands had fallen out of the hair tie to frame her beautifyul heart shaped face.

"Everything is a disaster," said the cranky baker. "Are you chewing gum?"

"Nope," said the gorgeous teen. She coughed into her hand suspiciously. Javert glared, but didn't say anything, even when he saw her trying to toss the gum in the trash a moment later. "So are the nun puffs ready to go out front?"

"Do they look like they're ready? These nuns are drunk!"

Javert gestured to the fallen religieux in despair.

"Bummer. Oh by the way, part of the sign out front fell off again."

The flaxen haired beauty handed him a curved metal hoop and he set it on an unused workbench.

"I'll get the ladder out and fix it after we close up. How are things out front? Are those idiot students actually buying anything today or are they just taking up space and leeching off my wifi again?"

"Marius bought coffee and a strudel," grinned the blonde. "I think he's into me."

"Psht!" Javert waved a hand dismissively. "He's too old for you. Anyway, if he really liked you he'd make his no-good friends buy a danish from time to time so I could afford to keep paying you."

"You want me to flirt them into buying something? I bet I could do that." She winked coquettishly and Javert rolled his eyes. "Oh and I nearly forgot! Enjolras wanted to know if they could hold a banner making workshop here tomorrow."

"Does this look like an art studio? Tell him no."

There was a jangling sound from out front.

"You should cut them some slack. They're good guys," argued the blonde spitfire determinedly. "They only want to make the banners for--"

"Cosette," sighed Javert. "That was a customer coming in. If you're back here with me, who's watching the counter?"

"Oh right!" Cosette giggled. "I guess I'll go and serve then."

"Do that," Javert intoned. "Leave me to my doomed nuns."

***

Cosette stepped through the door separating the bakery from the main cafe. Valjean was stood at the counter, trying way too hard to look casual.

"He's not coming out, she said bluntly and giggled as Valjean knocked over a display of scones in surprise.

"He's not? I mean, not that I... I don't even know who you're talking about." The last of the scones rolled to a halt and Valjean sighed. "Hi Cosette."

"You're lucky that your paranoia is so hilarious to me or I'd be legitimately annoyed about you ruining my display."

He smiled sheepishly and helped her to collect the absconded scones.

"I'll pay for those."

Cosette gave him a dazzling smile that displayed her teeth. her perfect, perfect teeth. 

"I just cleaned the counter, like, two minutes ago, so I think these ones are probably good. You can totally pay for the two that fell on the floor, though. Old man Javert's on a major budgeting kick. He'd probably stop it out of my pay if the register was short."

"Old man Javert?"

"Well, yeah. He's, like, thirty five or something!" Cosette took Valjean's money for the scones and continued to talk in a light and musical voice that sounded like angels. "Anyway he's worried about money. That place down the street is really eating into our profits."

"Thenardier's?" Valjean made a face. "The couple who run that place are such assholes."

"Hey, you don't have to tell me," said the attractive young girl. "I used to work there. They treat everybody like crap: employees, customers, even the artists whose work they display in that quote-unquote "gallery" of theirs."

"Plus the coffee sucks."

"Plus the coffee sucks," agreed the barrista with the model good looks. "Unfortunately, they're also way better at advertising and promotions and the business side of things. You wouldn't catch the Thenardiers slaving for hours over a nun-puff that's only going to retail at a buck fifty."

"Nun puffs?"

"It's a kind of eclair, apparently. I mean, I'm not gonna lie, they look totes delish, but they're not going to make this place any money."

"Sounds like you've got a decent business head on your shoulders."

Cosette beamed at the deserved compliment. 

"Comes of growing up in a single parent family, I guess." She shrugged. "If my dad had stuck around, I probably wouldn't have had to learn to economise so young."

Valjean nodded.

"Well, since you have a gift that way, why don't you advise Javert?"

"Ha! Like he'd listen! The guy's a total control freak. It beats me what you see in him, Valjean. Oh great, there go the scones again..."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You're a terrible liar Valjean. It's so obvious that you only come here because you have the hots for Javert."

"What makes you say that?"

"Nobody needs that many biscotti. You clearly have a crush on a member of staff and it's not like you'd have a chance with me since you're old enough to be my dad."

"Cosette, I'm 31."

"That's what I'm saying! Plus you're obviously about as straight as Tom Cruise, so that just leaves--"

"I'm not here because I have a crush on Javert, okay? I'm just here because I..." Valjean looked around frantically and snatched up a loaf of sourdough from the counter. "...because I want to buy some bread. Okay?"

Cosette blew a strand of her perfect blonde hair out of her face. 

"Suuuure you are. Hey would you be able to do me a favor?"

"I guess. What is it?"

"You work at Bishop's nightclub, right?"

"Yeah."

"Could you get me on the guest list for this Saturday?"

"I thought you were only eighteen."

"Right, and my fake ID sucks, hence the need to be on the guest list so that they'll just wave me in!"

"I'm not going to break the law and risk my job so that you can go underage drinking, Cosette."

"What? I should stay locked up in my room every Saturday night?" She pouted at him. "C'mon Valjean. I won't even drink. I just want a chance to spend some time with Marius."

Valjean looked at her as if she'd grown a second head.

"Marius Pontmercy? He's literally sitting at that table right there. Go talk to him now."

"Stop pointing!" hissed Cosette. "Anyway, it wouldn't work. He's too much of a gentleman to ask me out when I'm at work. I need to run into him at Bishop's when I'm not wearing an apron that smells of stale milk."

"I'm still not going to help you. You'll just have to come up with something on your own."

"Fine. See if I put in a good word for you with Javert now!"

"For the last time. There is nothing between me and Javert."

"Yeah, but you want there to be. You loooove him. You love his mouuuuustache. You love his nuuuuun puffs. "

"Hmmph."

The door jangled as Valjean walked out.

"Valjean, wait," yelled Cosette, peacemakingly. "Come back. I didn't mean it." Then in a slightly more urgent tone "Hey, dude! Wait up! You never paid for that sourdough!"

Javert poked his head out of the back room.

"What's all the noise?"

"Somebody just took off without paying for a loaf of bread," said Cosette, deciding not to mention the underage drinking and blackmail.

"WHAT?"

Before she could say another word, Javert was out of the door and racing down the street, bellowing "STOP THIEF!"

***

"...and I was so embarrassed that I just kept running! Now I can't ever go back there again." Valjean's head smacked down onto the bar. "Bishop, I'm such a mess."

Smiling, Valjean's boss poured out a shot of Jose Cuervo Silver.

"The silver's on me, okay?"

Valjean nodded in thanks and acknowledgement then tossed back the alcohol.

"Thanks, Bishop, but it's going to take plenty more of those to make me forget what an ass I made of myself earlier."

"Don't sweat it, VJ. You can totally come back from this."

"Really? How?"

"Just go back to the bakery, pay for the bread and tell Cosette that we're not prepared to put a teenager on the guest list--"

"And then she'll go and tell Javert that not only am I a thief, but--"

"I wasn't finished. You tell Cosette that she's not on the guest list, but her _mom_ 's name is and what she chooses to do with that information is up to her."

"You're going to bend the rules for her?"

Bishop laughed.

"I'm bending the rules for _you_ , bro. You've got it bad and if this girl can put a word in that'll help you get laid? Well, let's just say you need all the help you can get."

"Thanks... I think."

***

That Saturday night the queue outside Bishop's nightclub stretched down the block. at its head stood Cosette looking phenomenal in a silver halter top and a figure hugging balck skirt.

"Yeah, I should be on the guest list. My name's Fantine..."

Not far behind ehr were the amis.

"Thenardier's, though."

"What?" said Grantaire. "It's nice to go somewhere different from time to time. Besides, Thenardier's has a liquor license and I like Irish coffee."

Enjolras rolled his eyes.

"You could just smuggle booze into the Montreal Summer cafe, like the rest of us."

"It's the Montreal Sur Mer at the moment," said Marius, "The sign borke again."

"It's not the same," said Grantaire. "There's something about a real Irish coffee. Caffeine perks you up and alcohol smooths you out. It's like a breakfast vodka Red Bull."

"You are a crazy person," proclaimed Enjolras, fondly. "It's not like Thenardier's even serves good coffee."

"Cofee is not the important ingredient in an Irish coffee," says Grantair wisely. "Anyway, they bought one of my paintings!"

"Which one?"

"Nude Revolutionary With Paintbrush And Cheetos."

Enjolras smiled.

"I feel like you really captured me in that one."

"I did, didn't I? Anyway, I sold it to the Thenardiers and now I have twenty bucks to spend on drinks tonight. Who's a dumbass for giving them my custom _now_?"

"You are," said a small voice from behind them. 

"Eponine?"

"Hi Marius," said Eponine, blushing to the roots of her hair, which was dark and not as lustrous as Cosette's.

"Aren't you too young to drink?"

"Yes. I mean... that is to say... I just like to come and stand in line sometimes... for fun. Definitely not just to be close to you. That would be weird."

"Riiiiight. So what were you saying about Grantaire being a dumbass?"

The skinny, boyish dark-haired girl who was not very attractive shuffled her feet awkwardly.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean that. It's just... I heard Mom and Dad sell that painting for five hundred dollars to some collector. He's coming by again tomorrow to pick it up."

"Five hundred dollars?" Grantaire exclaimed, appalled. "Do you know how many Jaegerbombs that would buy?"

"THIS WILL NOT STAND," bellowed Enjolras. "WE MUST DO SOMETHING!"

Eponine who was totes sly, saw Cosette at the ehad of the queue looking all hot and said "Why don't we go over there now? I know the code for the burglar alarm. It's 24601. You could steal his painting back!"

"But what about clubbing?" asked Marius.

"Oh you don't want to go in there," said Eponine deviously. "I bet it's full of total skanks."

Grantaire shook his head. 

"Actually, I know what would eb really funny..."

***

The roof of the Montreal Summer Cafe had a great view of downtown, but Javert's attention was focused on the sky and Valjean's attention was focused on Javert.

"I like to come up here for a little peace and quiet," the baker explained.

"Is that a telescope?" the younger man queried.

"Yes it is," the older man retorted. "If you need something to calm you down aftr a stressful day, then I swear by the stars."

Valjean walked over to look through the telescope. Javert put his hands on top of Valjeans hands to help him adjust it and Valjean shivered in pleasure.

"Now see if you can see Sirius," the astronomer suggested. "It should look like a dog."

Right away, Valjean saw a group of stars shaped like a hound.

"Are you sirius?" Valjean said to himself.

"It's a bit early in the evening for that!" Javert expostulated. "But, yes, I suppose I am looking for something serious. I hadn't really thought about it before Valjean, but I've been very lonely. I'm glad Cosette arranged this for us."

Valjean's heart leapt!

"I've been going through a rough patch recently. I've been trying to build up the business, but everything has gone wrong. The Thenardiers steal my business, my pastries come out wrong, my only regulars are a bunch of no good teenybopper anarchists and worst of all, this morning somebody stole a loaf of bread from me!"

Valjean went pale. _He_ had stolen that loaf of sourdough! Should he confess? But if he did then Javert would never talk to him again, let alone invite him onto the roof for wine, stargazing and intimacy. But if he didn't then he would be a liar and he wouldn't deserve Javert anyway!

"Javert, I..."

There was a loud bang from the streets below. He looked from the edge of the roof and saw a group of figures running through the streets carrying guns.

"Javert! Look!"

Javert took the telescope from Valjean and focused on the fleeing figures.

"It's those no good art students! Come on, they're headed towards Thenardiers. We can cut them off!"

Javert launched himself over the edge of the roof and for a moment Valjean thought he'd leapt to his death, but then he saw the fire escape down which Javert was running two steps at a time.

***

THE NEXT MORNING...

Bishop was led into the cell by a policeman.

"Valjean! What happened?"

"We were all arrested for breaking into Thenardiers and vandalising a piece of valuable artwork with a paintball gun."

"Why did you vandalise--"

"I didn't! I was with Javert here when we noticed these students running through the streets with guns, so we chased them down. when we got to Thenardier's they were already inside and shooting paint all over the place causing damages. When we threatened to call the police, they barricaded the door to the cafe with furniture so that we couldn't leave!"

"It was my painting anyway," said a sulky Grantaire in the corner. "Serve those fatcats right. Vive la revolution!"

"The Thenardiers are saying that I put these hoodlums up to it, because I was jealous of their business" wailed Javert. "This will ruin me!" And they're accusing me and Valjean of lying about it, when it's perfectly clear that neither of us has told a lie in our lives!"

Bishop looked sternly at Valjean, who melted.

"Javert? IT WAS I WHO STOLE YOUR BREAD!"

"What?"

"It was an accident and I am so, so sorry. I tried to tell you before. I'll understand if you never want to speak to me again."

Javert looked stunned as Valjean continued.

"Bishop, would you possibly give me an advance on my salary so that I can post bail for Javert? You can leave me in ehre. I'm a bread thief and a liar. I deserve to be in jail."

Valjean began to cry.

"Actually, nobody's staying in jail," came a perky feminine voice from behind Bishop.

Cosette stepped into view. She was wearing a gorgeous summer dress in pale blue with kitten heels and looked ravishing. She was dragging the less pretty Eponine by the ear.

"The Thenardiers are dropping all charges. I explained that there was no breaking and entering involved because you were all invited onto the property by their daughter here who gave you the code to the burglar alarm! You're free to go!"

"Cosette!" shouted Marius. "You've saved us all! Thank you!"

The he swept her up into his manly embrace and kissed her.

"No problem," said the vivacious blonde. 

"I underestimated you," said Javert. "Please teach me how to run my bakery!"

"I will," said the radiant nymphette. "If you will promise to forgive Valjean."

"I will," said the baker. "because now I understand that people shouldn't be punished for mistakes."

The he swept Valjean up into his manly embrace and kissed him.

"And if you crazy guys want to do some new paintings for my club," said Bishop. "I'll pay you a fair amount for them without taking advantage."

Grantaire and Enjolras beamed.

"I guess everybody got a happy ending," said Cosette happily.

"What about me?" asked Eponine.

"Shut up," said Cosette. "You're dead to me."

THE END!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Give Us This Day - Art](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2232771) by Anonymous 




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